Remember that time when I woke up with a hickey on my neck? And no, I’m not talking about back when I was in high school.

In my last bunch of posts (That awkward moment…) I said two things that now, less than two weeks later, I’ve already gone back on:

1 – “After my experience with John, I will never date a coworker ever again.”

2 – “Maybe I should stop all this frivolous making out with people.”

I am so full of shit!!

1 – “After my experience with John, I will never date a coworker ever again.”

Last Thursday my company held its monthly happy hour. I debated going, because I like to go to Zumba on Thursdays and I didn’t want to skip the gym, but in the end my friends and I decided we “needed” a drink. So instead waiting until 6:30 for Zumba, I just went to the gym straight after work at 5:30 and did the arc trainer for 45 minutes. I made it to the happy hour by 6:30…where I proceeded to have 5 drinks and eat a bunch of fried bar food. Oh well, at least I made it to the gym, right?

Anyway, there’s this new guy at my job. He’s been there since the beginning of the year. He’s tall, fit, and cute, which is a rarity at my company, but unfortunately he’s also a religious Jew, as in he wears a yarmulke and is kosher and doesn’t go out on Fridays. He’s probably even worse of a match for me than the Bouncer was, but who cares, he’s hot! (I kid. Mostly.)

That night I decided to introduce myself to him, which is something I NEVER do but I was already buzzed and feeling confident. Next thing I know, it’s two hours later and we’ve been talking nonstop! I swear, it was like the first date I’ve always wanted to go on but never have. In that whole time I wasn’t bored once!

The night ended with him walking me to the train and then a kiss on the cheek. Nothing has happened with him since then, and now that I’m down from the high of that first conversation, I realize it never will, because we’re too different.

I did get a nice ego boost though. Normally I would have looked at someone like him and thought that he was too good for me. (“Why? Because he’s not broke and he’s doesn’t have a rap sheet?” my friend asked me.) But I know that he was digging me too, and it was nice to think that I could get him (or someone like him) if I tried.

Anyway, I just thought it was funny that I said I would NEVER date a coworker again, and now I’m already onto my next work crush. I should have said “I will never date a coworker again – unless he’s hot.”

2 – “Maybe I should stop all this frivolous making out with people.”

To be fair, I knew that the above statement was bs even as I was writing it. Why would I stop doing something that is so much fun?

On Friday, my friend and I debated what we should do after work. Neither of us wanted to drink, but we did want to do something, as opposed to just going home, and unfortunately there isn’t much to do in the city in the winter that doesn’t involve alcohol. We decided to go to a fancy bar near our job for a drink. Just one. (One turned into three, as it has a tendency to do.)

While we were sitting and talking, this pretty cute guy came and sat down at the next to us. For some reason I’m having a hard time figuring out the words to describe the layout of where we were all sitting, so here’s a picture:

That seat thing we were sitting on (what is it called?? a bench?) was really crowded, so when he came and wedged himself in he kind of pushed me to the left with his butt. He immediately turned to me to apologize, and from that point the ice was broken.

He was there with two coworkers who were hooking up with each other. Since he was the odd man out, eventually he turned to me and my friend and started chatting us up. It’s funny – I thought he was flirting with her, but when we talked about it while he was in the bathroom, she thought he was flirting with me. He was probably flirting with both of us, throwing out feelers to see who was interested.

Well, I was interested. I wasn’t being overly flirty or anything, but I must have been throwing out some type of signals, because at one point he thought it would be okay to stand up, grab my face and just start kissing me! (Okay, it wasn’t COMPLETELY out of the blue. After we shared a piece of fruit, we joked that we had just swapped spit and therefore had just made out. When I made the joke again a little while later, that’s when he stood up and kissed me.)

I wasn’t opposed to the kiss per se, but we had all been talking when he suddenly did that, so it was weird to be kissing someone right in front of my friend and his. I pulled away pretty quickly, but I definitely kicked the flirting up a notch at that point. Which is probably why my friend decided to make her exit shortly thereafter. I love my friends – no cockblocks in this group!

I ended up staying there with him for another hour or so before we called it a night. We alternated between talking and making out. At one he said to me “I’m going to give you a hickey.” I don’t know why I didn’t pull away – I guess because it felt too good and it has been so long since I had a hickey that I forgot what that actually entails.

Now I remember exactly what it entails.

The next morning I was up early meeting with my mom, her boyfriend, their realtor, and my ex husband (my mom and her bf are looking to buy this house, and my ex looking it over to make sure it’s worth the price. He’s in the construction industry.). So I’m looking in the mirror applying makeup when all of the sudden I notice this THING on my neck!

The hickey ended up being quite a pain in the ass. All morning I had to wear a scarf and make sure that my hair was covering it. And I couldn’t go to salsa on Saturday or Sunday because it was so dark that there was no way to hide it while I was dancing and sweating. Fortunately by Monday it had lightened up enough that I was able to cover it with concealer during my salsa class.

Next time someone says “I’m going to give you a hickey,” I will definitely say no. But I have to admit, I got a little thrill every time I looked at it, as it brought all of our steamy makeout moments right to the forefront of my mind.